Saturday, January 1, 2011

2011 Have We Really Changed?

Whoo Hoooo… 2011 is here. A new year with new resolutions. Unfortunately, for most of us, setting a resolution was the easy part… sticking with the resolution is a different story. It’s already the 1st of January and I have spoken with several friends and family members that mentioned they are starting their resolutions over again on Monday, why? because they couldn’t keep up with it one day after the new year! Sound familiar?
Not only am I guilty of doing this, but I am surrounded by friends and family doing it too… procrastinating and making excuses for not completing something, or even starting it for that matter. WHY do WE do this?
Simple things, Things like:
- Quit smoking… Let’s face it; we all know it’s bad for you. Not to mention it makes our breath smell like eight cans of shark poo.
- Getting fit… We all say it day in and out.  Who doesn’t love to feel great and look good? The last thing anyone wants to do is have to unbutton the top button on their pants at the dinner table just because they’ve shoved more food than necessary in they’re mouth. Now they’re bloated and feel like a pig in a blanket.
-Most importantly why can’t some of us just commit to something for once, stick with it, and make that commitment happen this year?
Does any of this stuff sound like you? And if so relax, take a deep breath, because I’m right there with ya.
So the question is: - what do we do differently this year? 
·         Let’s start off by looking in the mirror and admitting that we are far from perfect. Some of us have filled our heads up with the belief that we are though. We must have something that we would like to change about ourselves. Some of us are so insecure that we have to convince ourselves and the people around us that were hot stuff, and our poop does not stink. Guess what? If your body temp is 98 degrees then you’re not hot, you’re more Luke warm, and that’s not hot.  If your human then trust me,… ask your roommate, relative, or spouse if your poop stinks, I can guarantee you they’ll admit that it’s terrible and does not smell anything like roses.
·         We have to come to realize that anything in life that is worth living for, is NOT going to be easy to achieve. A lot of us love taking short cuts,… “I know because I too have taken quite a few in my life”. Taking short cuts are not going to get us where we really want to be. We don’t want to settle for a mediocre job or lifestyle, yet we believe that taking a short cut or cheating will get us there. Why is this? Is it because we don’t have the patience or perseverance to actually ride it out?... get what we want accomplished on our own without the help of others?... Life is far from easy and if you don’t believe me ask anyone who is successful. The majority of them that I have read about pretty much started with nothing, had all the odds against them and yet they have made it.
We have to start loving ourselves and the people we surround ourselves by; it is a waste of time and quite immature of us to have friends around us whom we speak so negatively about. Are we perfect ourselves? what have we really achieved in life?, how noble are you really? I mean have you saved a life or changed something for the better in someone else’s?
I have never been big on making resolutions when the New Year comes, simply because I always think that it’s not worth committing to something that I think I’ll break. This year unlike any other I will finally make a New Year’s Resolution.
It’s to “STOP LYING TO MYSELF”… Sounds bold I know. How many of you can admit that you lye constantly to yourself just to make yourself feel better about something? Maybe you do it because you want to convince yourself that something is going to change for the better although it has not yet? I constantly do it I believe it’s a sign of weakness or something.
You want to know what my weakness is? I can’t stick to a damn career for the life of me! I have been to school for Fashion Design and worked all over as a merchandiser. I have been to school to become a Medic and Medical Assistant. Fortunately I still work in the field. Yes, it has been very rewarding and of course I love what I do. I have been fortunate enough to work for the biggest alternative medical facility in America, treated thousands of patients from around the world and made a change for the better in each and every one of their lives. Here I am in 2011… I get to work every day as a personal assistant for a child with special needs whom I have grown to love and consider family, but what do I want to do now?... I have no damn idea. I’m terrified that here I am,.. 28yrs old and still don’t know what it’s going to be as far as my career.
This blogging thing seems fun. It seems as if I get to have a journal that is open for discussion on topics that affect me. Am I good at it? Doubt it. But I’m going to attend courses, read books from those who have made a name in the industry, try to learn from others mistakes and hopefully mine as well but most of all I’m going to give it one hundred and try to make the most of this as I always have until I know exactly what it is I want to do with myself.
 We all have something that we would love to change about ourselves and some of us have things that we would love to change about someone else, but you know what? We must learn to focus on bettering ourselves and realize we cannot change anyone else. If its change we want to see we must first become that change.
Let’s get back to the basics my friends, let’s love one another and help each other grow. Have you ever seen crabs in a bucket? What happens is you have crabs in a bucket and every time a crab is almost to the top of the bucket on his way out to freedom there’s another crab at the bottom pulling him right back down with them, “let us not be that crab”. We have got to change the way we live and treat each other let’s start seeing each other as brothers and sisters as opposed to distant strangers.
If we can learn to do these things I guarantee we will become that change we want to see in the world, we will love and have a much better respect for ourselves, and guarantee that we will be confident in what it is that we pursue.
Happy New Year’s


  1. Accepting where we are is a great "Step 1," as you point out above. Then, I go into dream and believe mode. I dream up where I want to get and I believe with all my heart that I'm already there.

    You're a good egg, Dre. I know you're working this and figuring it all out. I'm excited to watch it all progress.

  2. I love the crab analogy, and it fits into one of my own New Year's resolutions which is to not let others around me bring me down. I launched my own blog today with a "resolutions post" that starts exactly what you're talking about: not lying to myself. There will always be setbacks in achieving goals, but it doesn't mean we shouldn't keep going...

  3. I followed Chris Brogan's link here and I just have to say, this is so honest and so great. I love that your resolution is to stop lying to yourself. That is HUGE and, on the surface, seems bold, but if you really want to accomplish anything, this is where you have to start. This is where we all have to start. I know I'm not perfect, but I also know I'm not worthless. My challenge is that I have to believe more in myself, put myself out there more and, my resolution for this year, be FEARLESS. I've got to take the plunge. That's my New Year's Resolution. Thanks for keeping me in line on the first day.

  4. You've probably read this but it reminded me of the blog post so I'm leaving the link in case. :)


  5. Dre

    Congrats on the launch of your blog! So very exciting.

    The new year brings on so many promises. Some are kept some are gone 15 min after the clock strikes 12. We are asking ourselves to change and change is hard unless we are forced in it with no alternative.

    Wonderful read and look forward to seeing so much more.

  6. Very unique and personal post. I also followed Chris Brogan's Tweet over here and like everything Chris recommends it was well worth it. I will keep it bookmarked and share with others.

    Most people need to evaluate what they are doing to become better people. By recognizing we are not perfect as you mentioned gives us a good idea on how to move forward by helping ourselves and others.

    I had heard of the Crab Analogy in another matter regarding team building and how various cultures work together to move forward.

    Regarding staying with a career my friend Chris Brogan actually made me realize that understanding the word career is a lot more complex than what we think. From their on I have focused on improving myself, my surroundings, and getting to do the things I want to do by staying away from the one's I don't like to do.

    Excellent Post
    Raul (@

  7. Thank you all, you’re far too kind.
    @Chris thanks for everything if I hadn’t came across one of your posts while googleing stuff as I always do I would have never picked up a book on blogging and found this new journey. You’ve been nothing but great I’m still learning from Social Media 101, and Trust Agents. I’m so new to this social media and blogging thing that I haven’t really even understood half of what I’m reading but fortunately my fiancée with a masters in marketing and advertising has been helping make sense of this new language for me ha-ha
    @Pam- I loved your blog entry I read it and will be looking for more of it
    @cloverdew- your awesome for doing what your pursuing lets fight this together and we can do anything if we really set our minds to it "we know this already" but I often think a lot of us are seriously afraid of failing since we never give our self’s a chance to fail we just quit and think back years later "what if"
    @chel- I have read that post by Penn he’s pretty unique in an awesome way he’s got a way with words I admit thanks for keeping me up to date
    @-Suzanne,.. Well you’ve just been amazing since day one your tweets are awesome and informative and your sense of humor always makes me smile
    @- Raul thanks for your kind words of wisdom your buddy Brogan is something else I know I can’t stand not waking up everyday looking forward to his emails and tweets he’s just on top of his game. I’m glad things are going well for you and what you’re doing and I’m sure 2011 is gona bring nothing but greatness to us all

    to the other 359 friends who read the post or better yet even if ya just clicked on it and skimmed hey... thanks anyways I hope it did something positive for each and every one of you and if it didn’t well hopefully the following entry’s will!
    Stay amazing friends and let’s kick some tail this New Year!
    Andre McKay

  8. First off congrats to this new chapter in your story. There are not many people of our age with the depth and insight that you show. I admire that. Thank you and I look forward to following your thoughts.

    P.s. way to make it off left bench slugger.